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I’m looking for ways to make essential changes in My Temporary Life. The vibe here, in the Netherlands, is healthier. The culture is more calm and thoughtful.
Even though busy Amsterdam is just a short tram ride away, I see sheep grazing and people biking and walking by. It’s the classic peaceful Dutch experience, and I love it. But in my head, I’m always busy.
Being busy is the backbone of the American culture. Everyone seems to push us to do more, and we push ourselves, too. We rush. We multitask. We race against the clock.
When we’re on the hamster wheel, we keep busy, but there is no reward at the end.
Here are five things I did to get off the hamster wheel, free up my time, and reduce stress.
I don’t feel like I’m being pushed or pushing myself to keep on my (unrealistic) schedule.
Easy to stick with = 5
Positive lifestyle results = 5
My default has always been working. Once I turned on my computer, I was there until I went to bed. It’s not that I was all that productive; I believed I was being creative. Hamster wheel.
One day, I realized I frequently checked my watch to see if I was working fast enough. And I thought, that’s ridiculous- it’s like time is running my life, and I’m not okay with that.
I just took my watch off. It was that easy. If I really needed to know the time, I would check my phone.
I don’t miss it and I’m not so critical of myself. And I sleep very well now.
Easy to stick with = 5
Positive lifestyle results = 5
I wore a Fitbit for years, and I liked wearing a Fitbit. I’d check how I slept overnight, my resting pulse, and my steps. However, I noticed I had developed adverse thought patterns while following my data.
My sleep was “too restless,” and I was sure I needed to fix that. My ego was thrilled when I walked 24,000 steps despite being exhausted. Somehow, Fitbit and I had become allies to harshly evaluate me and my data.
I was ready to end the relationship and I just took it off. I had used the device long enough to know how much exercise I needed.
It’s effortless not to watch the clock. I’m not rushing around and waiting just because of the time on the clock.
Easy to stick with = 5
Positive lifestyle results = 5
It would have been easy to fall back on looking at the clock to keep track of time, but essentially, I did not want to keep track of time as I had in the past.
Sure, there were some events where I needed to know the time; otherwise, I managed to go through my day without checking.
I just took away the temptation and turned the clock around. My priorities have changed, and I naturally do what I planned to do. I check the time at night to do what I must and get to bed on time.
The daylight helps to inform me, too; I know the approximate time when the sun sets. If I’m out, I think about returning home in terms of sunset and not time.
Sometimes I want to curl up on the sofa with a book, and maybe I will someday.
Easy to give up = 3
Working well = 5
I like to read and picked up the reading-before-bed habit years ago. But for the last few months, I started staying up late to read. And if I couldn’t sleep, I would pick up a book and read a few hours more.
What started as a cozy way to wind down before going to sleep became a sleep disruptor.
All my books are on my Kindle, so all I had to do was put it in a drawer, knowing that, eventually, the battery would drain. The “how” part was easy. But I missed reading in bed at first.
My before-bed-time routine had to be filled with something else. I watch Taskmaster episodes these nights while doing my teeth chores and going to bed at 10:00 PM. This schedule works surprisingly well. I fall asleep quickly and sleep well throughout the night.
I like having books out of my orbit for now, and I like having to look for other satisfying ways to indulge.
Multitasking is a hard habit to break, but satisfaction is found by doing one thing at a time.
Easy to give up = 3
Working well = 5
When did we start multitasking? That’s just crazy. When we multitask, we run around irrationally, not paying attention to anything we do when everything we do could be better.
Multitasking is more complicated to stop. Being in the moment is hard to do, too. So, it’s a little of both. I multitask when I have things that I don’t want to do. I feel rushed and pushed.
So, here’s my trick: go very slow. When I feel myself trying to rush, I tell myself to go slow and pay attention to the one thing I need to do in the moment. The surprising and weird thing is that I enjoy the task when I slow down and pay attention. It makes no sense, but it works.
I am used to multitasking all day and night. Now, I catch myself if I start to do more than one thing, and I ask myself: which one do I want to do? Usually, my answer is I want to continue to do what I started first.
The focus for my temporary life is about creating the best life for myself that I can. The best way to start is to minimize the friction my brain expects, like cleaning out my brain’s closet. Making these five changes frees me up to be more spontaneous and smarter.
I’m starting to see more things I can let go of, but I want to give what I’ve started a chance to stick and become permanent.
I hope this helps. Let me know which change is easiest or difficult for you. 🙂
Cheers!
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